NFC East Preview

Dallas Cowboys – Rock of Love

Why Rock of Love? –

Poison front man Bret Michaels was as cool as cool can be in the 80’s and early 90’s. He was the personification of a “rock star”. Then he left the lime light for many years and was thought of as somewhat of a punch line. Only the real Poison fans still loved Bret Michaels. The old ageing hipster who was not as cool as he thought he was. In the late 2000’s, Bret made a splash with Rock of Love and he was back. Bret was cool again. Women between the ages of 16 and 50 loved him, and guys (me included, as evidenced by my 2008 Halloween costume), wanted to be him. His career, while a few years ahead on the timeline, has paralled the Dallas Cowboys of the last 20 years. I know the Cowboys had some die-hard fans during the Tom Landry era who stuck with them until they became “America’s Team” in the 90’s with Aikman, Smith and Irvin, but many fans, including thousands of kids my age, became Dallas bandwagon fans. I think I saw more Cowboys starter jackets at recess than all other teams combined. After the Aikman years, the Boys had some hard times. I suppose I will give the 90’s bandwagon fans some credit if they stuck by them during this period. You are off the hook if you truly stood by the team during the late 90’s and early 2000’s. By 2008, with Tony Romo becoming a star, the Cowboys were getting some fans back and building the most breathtaking stadium known to man. This means more bandwagon fans. I applaud the fans who stuck with Bret Michaels and the Cowboys through thick and thin, seriously, I do, but even they have to admit, the bandwagoners get a little annoying. I know how it is. I met a lot more Vikings fans than ever before last season, and I saw a lot of Indians fans in 2007 that I haven’t seen since. It is tough for a real fan to see these guys jumping on the bandwagon, but it is the nature of sports fandom. So to you true Cowboys and Bret Michaels fans, touché and good luck. To the bandwagon jumpers, You are a rose thorn in my ass.

Analysis – I don’t like the Dallas defense. I don’t know a ton about them, but the last time I saw the Dallas D, they were being punished by the Vikings. Even if the defense is sub-par, this offense should be good enough to get them into the playoffs. I’m no Tony Romo fan, but with Marion Barber, Felix Jones carrying the ball and opening up the pass, and Miles Austin, Dez Bryant and Jason Witten catching his passes, he will have big numbers. I am interested to see how Bryant actually performs against an NFL secondary. Hopefully better than his mentor Deion did when he played offense. The Cowboys were a popular pick to make and win the Super Bowl a month ago. Then, the experts saw the preseason and changed their mind. I think the hate piled on the Cowboys over the last couple weeks was completely unfounded. Who gives a shit about the preseason? They will be in the playoffs and be a real contender to win it all.

Favorite Player – Miles Austin. Not a fan of his, but I have him in fantasy so he might as well do good.

Least Favorite Player – Tony Romo. Romo is getting better. I admit that. He was however anointed as an elite NFL QB without doing much of anything a couple years ago. He was completely undeserving of the praise, although he is starting to earn a little of it, but just a little. Add that to the fact I just plain don’t like him very much, and he is from Eastern Illinois, which I equate with Jake Christensen. Bad combination.

2009 Record – 11-5

2010 Prediction – 12-4

Washington Redskins – LOST

Why LOST? –

The last season of LOST was so anticipated and talked about that I could hardly contain the excitement. I would rush home from work every Tuesday and fire up the DVR to watch the newest episode, and be thoroughly confused the whole time. The Redskins 2010 season has been just as anticipated and talked about. The McNabb addition, the return of Mike Shanahan, and the Albert Haynesworth soap opera all contributed to this excitement. Just like LOST, I have no idea what the Redskins will do this year. There is many different ways I could see the Skins season going, I’m just glad one of them isn’t an alternate universe, cause that gets too confusing.

Analysis – Like I said before, I really have no feel for the Redskins. I’m predicting seven wins, but I could see it going anywhere between four and ten really. It all depends how Clinton Portis returns this year, how McNabb adjusted to his new teammates, namely Santana Moss and Chris Cooley, and how Shanahan’s defense plays, with or without Haynesworth. It is no secret that McNabb gets banged up a lot, and if he does this year, the Skins are in trouble. The backup is Rex Grossman.

Favorite Player – Donovan McNabb. I used to really like McNabb in Philly. Everybody was riding the Michael Vick train, and I steadfastly claimed McNabb was better than Vick. Always was better as far as I am concerned. I just wish the Vikings had made a play for McNabb this offseason.

Least Favorite Player –Albert Haynesworth. Come on Albert, I know your fat, and need to be large to do your job effectively, but get in good enough shape to tale Shanahan’s silly test. Eat a salad.

2009 Record – 4-12

2010 Prediction – 7-9

Philadelphia Eagles – It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia

Why Always Sunny? –

There really isn’t anything about the actual Eagles team that reminds me of Always Sunny, but I have learned Eagles fans are not that much more sane than the guys running Paddy’s Pub. I went to Philly this summer, and although I wish I had someone who knew the city to show me around, I wasn’t overly impressed. I would like to go again and see if with some guidance I would like it more. The people were not friendly, the city made me feel more unsafe than when I had to exit the New York Subway in Harlem, and the mall downtown by the big Paul Revere sucked. On the bright side, the cheesesteaks were awesome, Citizen’s Bank Ballpark was cool, and the waitresses at McFadden’s were unbelievably good looking. After my short time in Philly, I think Mac, Dennis and Charlie would fit right in at an Eagles game, and probably not be the craziest or rudest people there. It’s just part of Philly being Philly.

Analysis – I really like the Eagles receivers Jeremy Maclin and DeSean Jackson, and running back LeSean McCoy. However, and I may be in the minority here, but I don’t think Kevin Kolb will be a very good NFL quarterback. I just never liked what I saw from him when filling in with McNabb. That’s all I have to base my opinion on, but it wasn’t good. I still think they have an outside shot at the playoffs because of their athleticism on both offense and defense, but it will be tough.

Favorite Player – Jeremy Maclin. Maclin was extremely fun to watch at Missouri, and he still is.

Least Favorite Player - Michael Vick. He will always win this award, no matter how long he plays and who he plays for.

2009 Record – 11-5

2010 Prediction – 9-7

New York Giants – The Sopranos

Why The Sopranos? –

When I went to New York, I stayed at a Red Roof Inn on Meadowlands Parkway in Secaucus, New Jersey. I could literally see the Meadowlands from my hotel room. The River there, I believe it is the East River, made me ponder how many bodies are floating in the bottom of it. I’ll be honest, New York made me want to join the mafia. Where do I sign up? The Giants always struck me as the “mafia” team. The Jets were usually loveable, or hateable, losers, but the Giants are New York. I don’t recall what team Tony Soprano and Pauly Walnuts supported, but I would not have been surprised to have seen them walking along the East River, with the Meadowlands in the background, talking about happenings at the Bada-Bing, while both wearing Eli Manning jerseys. Scratch that, Lawrence Taylor jerseys.

Analysis – The Giants were 8-8 last year, and I don’t know if they did anything to better themselves. Eli is still a bitch. Mario Manningham, Hakim Nix and Steve Smith should be decent. Ahmad Bradshaw and Brandon Jacobs are also serviceable. The defensive line is tough. But all these things remind me of last year. With the Cowboys and Redskins improving, and the Eagles being a dangerously athletic team capable of winning some games, I don’t see how the Giants could improve by more than a game or two.

Favorite Player – Mario Manningham. I liked him at Michigan and picked him late in my fantasy draft as a sleeper. He is often overlooked and a solid receiver.

Least Favorite Player – Eli Manning. As much as I love Peyton Manning, I dislike Eli the same amount.

2009 Record – 8-8

2010 Prediction – 8-8